


Surprise...?

by VindictiveStorm



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: But I hope there was relationship feels, Established Relationship, F/F, None of my headcanons made it on the fic, Not as fluffy as I wanted, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-12
Updated: 2017-04-12
Packaged: 2018-10-17 22:17:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10603383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VindictiveStorm/pseuds/VindictiveStorm
Summary: Aria T'Loak was going to surprise the hell out of her bondmate with a spontaneous visit. What she finds is just a touch concerning though. [Slightly Cracky. It's not something that's serious food for the mind, just something I wanted written. Apologies for any grammar and spelling errors that I haven't caught.]





	

Aria slipped from shadow to shadow with skilled ease. As an old matron, and certified badass, it went without saying that if she needed something done, she would find her ways to do so. Granted, most of the time, she treated herself generously, reaping success and looting treasures with naught but the most decisive, badass-boss, head tilts. For special occasions though, very truly special ones, Aria had no qualms hauling herself off her throne and stepping onto the unworthy soil of whatever unfortunate planet that demanded her attention so. However, she would always remain conflicted concerning one particular planet. Or station, really.

_“Babe, crime happens everywhere, not even your freakishly clean buildings can hide that.”_

_“You are putting words into my mouth again. I’m saying that the Citadel is probably safer - not for the lack of crime-”_

_“Yeah, just because you have a bunch of cops doesn’t mean it’ll stop some idiot from salivating at the idea of taking down some asshat or another for a sweet deal of creds or a year's worth of sand.”_

_“Difference is that there’s a higher chance of getting away from such an encounter lightly wounded than outright dead, Aria. Only a very few select people would just fall over and play dead when a gun starts firing.”_

_“God you are such a bitch. Will you let that go already? I’m not above throwing someone who has a biotic leash on them out a window.”_

Funny that that would be the first thing that came to her mind when she found herself staring at an obviously tampered door. The lights in the hallway were dim, but not so much that one would be unable to see the features of another. As theories flew wildly in her head, Aria gave herself the luxury of a few seconds to indulge in them before tightening a grip on them all - containing them.

Silently pulling her sidearm and flickering off the safety just as smoothly, she gave herself another good look at the adjacent doors, squinted at the ends of the hallways with a good biotic pulse in her immediate area before lightly pushing the door open. As the soft light from the hallways spilled into the dark room - Aria’s eyes immediately gravitated towards the ripped clothed - tablecloth - that was identified at her feet. Her lover could hardly do such a thing, ever the fragile, delicate asari. Aria would have expected at least a broken finger from Tevos if she actually lost her mind and needed to decimate the tablecloth.

Opening the door just a little wider, Aria truly choked on her breath when she saw the head of an asari illuminated just to her right. Walking over to inspect the head rigidly, as was demanded by her badass-nature, the not-fear was quickly turned into guilt and doubt for whatever reason. Truly, Aria T’Loak was at a loss, and could not fathom the emotion that one should be experiencing when one happened to stumble across the life sized plushie of themselves horribly executed with nothing but a few kitchen knives. Most of which were still impaled in the detached head and body.

Surely, Tevos would never do such a thing. Not without a reason. Not that she had one, of course.

Stepping over the spilled stuffing and beans, her next discovery lit a new fire within the asari badass. Anger ran through her veins, and for once in her long life time, she felt it genuinely justified. She could ignore the torn white jackets (spares), the lightly burned-crispy spare leather pants on the frying pan, the bold message-statement that was the life sized plushy doll, and Goddess knows whatever the fuck else she saw on her way to the bedroom. The one thing that she absolutely refused to accept would be a broken, scarred, hurt, weeping, or what-have-you, Tevos.

With a perfected door-shattering biotic charge, Aria T’Loak made her entrance into the dark room. Left and right, clothes were scattered, jewelry was broken and spread across the floor, and oddly enough the only thing that wasn’t completely tampered with was the neat stack of datapads on the table stand. However, Aria truly could not tell if the same could be said about the asari who slumbered (she hoped) upon the sheets.

Holstering the skillfully-stolen Paladin, Aria sauntered over to the bedside, staring at the confirmed-slumbering body of Tevos. Unharmed and only exhausted it seemed. Now having a moment to herself, Aria knelt down, maintaining an eye-level with the asari who was adorably snoring. Looking at the asari now, it was no wonder she was chosen as Councillor - as one Aethyta had described, the sex appeal had been dangerously lethal before the poor maiden that was Tevos was leashed onto the job. Not that the same edge had disappeared for good, Aria had simply selfishly took the Goddess given gift that was Tevos all for herself.

Her mind flashed back to the many warnings the rest of the apartment seemed to give her though. Her clothes were fucking baked and cooked, the plush toy - which she hated with a passion by the way, and not only because she couldn’t get the royalties for it - that screamed death threat, and for fucks sake she found her pillow - her pillow, the first gift that cemented the fact that Tevos would expect, accept and demand Aria’s presence and affections until the end of eternity - was found inside the toilet bowl.

“What have I done, Cila?” The soft plea spilled forth quietly, “What could have caused such anger from you of all people?” The Queen of Omega continued, her hands fisted on the sheets, not once daring to reach over to Tevos - her own Queen. “I haven’t even committed crime thus far in my shitty stay here on this floating oversized bullet-shaped tin-can,” She muttered out, almost hatefully. Almost pouting.

It was then that Tevos stirred though. Quietly, Aria watched, eyes peeled for any indication of a wound or discomfort. Finding none and satisfied, Aria was quick to abandon her worries and immediately dig for answers - as any well trained badass would.

“Good morning sweet cheeks, I’d accuse you of having a giant inter-species orgy if I didn’t know you better,” Aria started out, but then paused, taking the blank and unfocused eyes into account, “fuck, are you drugged?” Aria clicked her tongue, snapping her fingers just in Tevos’ periphery.

With a displeased mummer, Tevos batted the rude hand away, “...time?” She muttered weakly, turning her head towards where her clock should have been, though Aria doubted that her adorable bondmate could actually see anything anyway.

“Late … or early rather,” Aria replied, “did you have that much fun trashing my shit?” she asked, as nonchalantly as she could.

“...”

Getting a weak groan, of confusion or hesitation, in reply, Aria sighed, clearly frustrated. “Babe, it’s one thing to toss my shit out into the garbage cans, but how the hell do you justify my leather pants in the frying pan while convincing me you haven’t been jacked up on 4 different kinds of helix?”

“What you talkin’ abou … ?”

Genuine confusion. Adorable. Concerning, too. Aria squinted, “My pillow is swimming in shit, my clothes are ripped and scattered in every room, and not to mention the long overdue death of that retarded sex-doll you keep around ... “ Shifting her weight nervously - no, she did so because kneeling for anything other than delivering good oral was tedious for her - she bit her lip for a good second, spying for any true traces of anger or hate in her dear bondmates eyes before quietly inquiring, “Are you mad at me?” Weak. What a loser, she hissed inwardly.

Unable to contain herself, Tevos surged forward, arms fumbling weakly around Aria’s shoulders as her mind violently pressed itself upon Aria’s - layering worry, fear and confusion with equal amounts of reassurances and adoration - pure affection. Her Aria should not have any reason to lose her strength in her presence. While Tevos would do all she needed and wanted to to support Aria no matter how strong or weak she (Aria) may be, she did not take pleasure in creating the uncharacteristic softness and weakness - causing turmoil within the delicate balance of chaos that made up Aria T’Loak. Ever the politician, and opportunist, Tevos would only enjoy how the Queen of Omega would rise and fall beautifully or lewdly to her challenges, never would she stick a hand to ensure weakness or strength to be brought out. Once Tevos decided Aria had been given a proper answer, she pulled back and appraised the room with clearer eyes.

“... I do not believe that I had a hand in this, if it is … “ a quick glance at the clock at Aria’s feet, “well, I believe I’ve only rested for a mere 45 minutes,” Tevos grunted out, clearly irritated. “I …,” she turned her head the other way, “must have missed this in my haste to get some rest,” she muttered, embarrassed.

“Your sex-doll was murdered and you didn’t even notice?” Aria bit out, clearly playful.

“Well I figured the next best thing was on it’s way, so I could at least pretend to be faithful and loyal for just one night,” Tevos replied with the most cunning of smiles.

“Ugh. Slut,” Aria growled, seating and swinging herself onto the bed.

Just as the two cuddled, Aria made one more remark that would send them into fits of giggles in the far future, “You do realize you probably got robbed and you didn’t even bat an eye, right? Your ass belongs in Omega you pretentious tight ass.”

**Author's Note:**

> \+ Based on a real situation that I heard about, it's horrible but: A robber is going around at like 12-4AM breaking into empty houses and looting shit. A wife comes home at like 5AM, doesn't see any of the disasters because she's tired and sleeps. The husband comes home and is genuinely confused and wakes his wife up, "...Was anyone else here?", "What no, I've been sleeping here (couch) the whole time!", "...Are you mad at me then????"
> 
> \+ Gave Tevos a first name Cila - [Sigh-La]
> 
> \+ Biotic Leash: Personal plot bunny that asari that are doing off-world politics are usually cuffed with biotic dampeners because every asari could literally blow anything up if they got angry or decided that the idiot they're arguing with was just not worth it. Also because Udina not getting slapped with a Flare for touching Tevos was STUPID.


End file.
